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Archive for the ‘Biscuit’ Category

Some famous cricket quotes

Posted by wildkiwi25 on November 28, 2008

Over the years there have been a number of players that have been known for their words just as much as their cricketing exploits. Some of them will never be forgotten, although some of the players on the receiving end may wish they could be.

Here are some of the stand out quotes I have come across as of late:

Glen McGrath (Australia) and Eddo Brandes (Zimbabwe):

Aussie paceman Glenn McGrath was bowling to Zimbabwe number 11 Eddo Brandes – who was just missing each ball. McGrath, frustrated, went to him and inquired: “Why are you so fat?”Quick as a flash, Brandes replied, “Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit.”

———————————-

Freddie Trueman & Raman Subba Row:

Fearsome English fast bowler Fred Trueman extraced an edge from the batsman, which flew straight into the hands of Raman Subba Row at first slip. The ball however went right between Row’s legs to the third man boundary. Fred didn’t say a word. At the end of the over, Row ambled past Trueman and apologised sheepishly. “Sorry Fred. I should’ve kept my legs together”. Trueman retorted in classic fashion “Not you, son. Your mother should’ve!”
———————————-
“It’s been very slow and dull day, but it hasn’t been boring. It’s been a good, entertaining day’s cricket. – BRIAN JOHNSTON”
———————————-
“He’s usually a good puller – but he couldn’t get it up that time.” – BRIAN JOHNSTON”
———————————-
“He’s fat, he’s round, he bounces on the ground, Shane Warne, Shane Warne.” – Barmy Army.
———————————-
Shane Warne : “I’ve waited two years for another chance to humiliate you.”
Daryll Cullinan : “Looks like you spent it eating.”
———————————-
“What do you think this is, a f***ing tea party? No you can’t have a f***ing glass of water. You can f***ing wait like all the rest of us.”
-Allan Border to Robin Smith.
———————————-
“Mate, if you turn the bat over, you’ll see the instructions on the back!”
-Merv Hughes to Robin Smith.
———————————-
Merv Hughes : “You can’t f**king bat.”
Robin Smith : “Hey Merv, we make a fine pair. I can’t f**king bat and you can’t f**king bowl.”
———————————-
“Tufnell! Can I borrow your brain? I’m building an idiot.”
-Voice from the crowd, Newcastle Test.
———————————-
“A fart competing with thunder.”
-Graham Gooch on England’s chances in Australia in 1990-91.
———————————-

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Posted in Allan Border, Biscuit, Daryll Cullinan, Eddo Brandes, entertainment, Famous cricket quotes, Fred Trueman, Glenn McGrath, Graham Gooch, Merv Hughes, Phil Tufnell, Robin Smith, Shane Warne, sledging | Leave a Comment »

Some famous cricket quotes

Posted by wildkiwi25 on November 28, 2008

Over the years there have been a number of players that have been known for their words just as much as their cricketing exploits. Some of them will never be forgotten, although some of the players on the receiving end may wish they could be.

Here are some of the stand out quotes I have come across as of late:

Glen McGrath (Australia) and Eddo Brandes (Zimbabwe):

Aussie paceman Glenn McGrath was bowling to Zimbabwe number 11 Eddo Brandes – who was just missing each ball. McGrath, frustrated, went to him and inquired: “Why are you so fat?”Quick as a flash, Brandes replied, “Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit.”

———————————-

Freddie Trueman & Raman Subba Row:

Fearsome English fast bowler Fred Trueman extraced an edge from the batsman, which flew straight into the hands of Raman Subba Row at first slip. The ball however went right between Row’s legs to the third man boundary. Fred didn’t say a word. At the end of the over, Row ambled past Trueman and apologised sheepishly. “Sorry Fred. I should’ve kept my legs together”. Trueman retorted in classic fashion “Not you, son. Your mother should’ve!”
———————————-
“It’s been very slow and dull day, but it hasn’t been boring. It’s been a good, entertaining day’s cricket. – BRIAN JOHNSTON”
———————————-
“He’s usually a good puller – but he couldn’t get it up that time.” – BRIAN JOHNSTON”
———————————-
“He’s fat, he’s round, he bounces on the ground, Shane Warne, Shane Warne.” – Barmy Army.
———————————-
Shane Warne : “I’ve waited two years for another chance to humiliate you.”
Daryll Cullinan : “Looks like you spent it eating.”
———————————-
“What do you think this is, a f***ing tea party? No you can’t have a f***ing glass of water. You can f***ing wait like all the rest of us.”
-Allan Border to Robin Smith.
———————————-
“Mate, if you turn the bat over, you’ll see the instructions on the back!”
-Merv Hughes to Robin Smith.
———————————-
Merv Hughes : “You can’t f**king bat.”
Robin Smith : “Hey Merv, we make a fine pair. I can’t f**king bat and you can’t f**king bowl.”
———————————-
“Tufnell! Can I borrow your brain? I’m building an idiot.”
-Voice from the crowd, Newcastle Test.
———————————-
“A fart competing with thunder.”
-Graham Gooch on England’s chances in Australia in 1990-91.
———————————-

Posted in Allan Border, Biscuit, Daryll Cullinan, Eddo Brandes, entertainment, Famous cricket quotes, Fred Trueman, Glenn McGrath, Graham Gooch, Merv Hughes, Phil Tufnell, Robin Smith, Shane Warne, sledging | Leave a Comment »

Player Profile(#26)…Eddo Brandes (Zimbabwe)

Posted by wildkiwi25 on June 28, 2008

Photobucket

Eddo André Brandes (born March 5, 1963, Port Shepstone, KwaZulu-Natal, South Africa) is a former Zimbabwean cricketer who played in 10 Tests and 59 ODIs from 1987 to 1999, spanning four World Cups.

He took a hat-trick in an ODI against England in January 1997 that is still regarded as the highest in terms of total average of the batsmen dismissed. The Mirror ran a headline proclaiming “Clucking useless!; England lose to chicken farmer” to mark the occasion, making Eddo Brandes perhaps the most famous chicken-farmer to ever play cricket. Only two months short of his 34th birthday, he remains the oldest player to have taken an ODI hat-trick.

As of 2003 Brandes has moved to Australia to pursue a coaching career, and is currently coaching the Sunshine Coast Scorchers who play in the XXXX Gold Brisbane Grade Competition/ Tewantin-Noosa Thunder.

He is also known for this quote:

-Exchange between Glenn McGrath, the Australian bowler, and Eddo Brandes after McGrath gets frustrated at being unable to dismiss Brandes.

1.McGrath: “Why are you so fat?”
2.Brandes: “Because every time I f*** your wife she gives me a biscuit.”

More info about Eddo Brandes can be found by right-clicking Cricinfo Profile on Eddo Brandes.

Photobucket

Posted in Biscuit, Chicken Farmer, Eddo André Brandes, Glenn McGrath, KwaZulu-Natal, Port Shepstone, South Africa, Sunshine Coast Scorchers, Tewantin-Noosa Thunder, XXXX Gold Brisbane Grade Competition | Leave a Comment »

Player Profile(#26)…Eddo Brandes (Zimbabwe)

Posted by wildkiwi25 on June 28, 2008

Photobucket

Eddo André Brandes (born March 5, 1963, Port Shepstone, KwaZulu-Natal, South Africa) is a former Zimbabwean cricketer who played in 10 Tests and 59 ODIs from 1987 to 1999, spanning four World Cups.

He took a hat-trick in an ODI against England in January 1997 that is still regarded as the highest in terms of total average of the batsmen dismissed. The Mirror ran a headline proclaiming “Clucking useless!; England lose to chicken farmer” to mark the occasion, making Eddo Brandes perhaps the most famous chicken-farmer to ever play cricket. Only two months short of his 34th birthday, he remains the oldest player to have taken an ODI hat-trick.

As of 2003 Brandes has moved to Australia to pursue a coaching career, and is currently coaching the Sunshine Coast Scorchers who play in the XXXX Gold Brisbane Grade Competition/ Tewantin-Noosa Thunder.

He is also known for this quote:

-Exchange between Glenn McGrath, the Australian bowler, and Eddo Brandes after McGrath gets frustrated at being unable to dismiss Brandes.

1.McGrath: “Why are you so fat?”
2.Brandes: “Because every time I f*** your wife she gives me a biscuit.”

More info about Eddo Brandes can be found by right-clicking Cricinfo Profile on Eddo Brandes.

Photobucket

Posted in Biscuit, Chicken Farmer, Eddo André Brandes, Glenn McGrath, KwaZulu-Natal, Port Shepstone, South Africa, Sunshine Coast Scorchers, Tewantin-Noosa Thunder, XXXX Gold Brisbane Grade Competition | Leave a Comment »